Life Lately – Summer 2020

Hello again friends! I certainly didn’t plan to take a 3-month hiatus from my Life Lately series but as I’m sure you’ve noticed, life has been a little bit unpredictable lately.

I went back to see what I wrote in my March post thinking I’d be in a much different headspace but my mind remains a jumble of emotions and numbness, as I wrote at the time. Thankfully, my emotions are being driven less by frazzled adrenaline and the numbness now stems more from acceptance than denial, so I guess that’s progress, right?

As I’m sure is the case for many, this summer has challenged me in ways that I never could have anticipated. This has been a season of survival and growth, which in turn have revealed new areas of strength and purpose. I’ve finally been able to wrap my head around some of it and thought it was time to touch base with you!

For this life lately I’ll be sharing:

Bright spots from the last few months (+ deck reno preview & my favourite foliage photo, possibly ever!)
A few honest low points
My favourite four-pawed pals
How my 5 words of 2020 are resonating these days.
+ A very sneaky peek of an upcoming collab

Do join me if you’ve got a few moments to spare!

THE BRIGHT SPOTS

MORNING COFFEE & BREAKFAST OUTSIDE

There’s nothing like a tasty breakfast (yes we have corn for breakfast ha!) with a fresh coffee before the day heats up.

ROBIN FAMILY IN THE VINES

Our resident robins returned to raise a new set of babies this year. It was such a joy to hear them chirp and see their fuzzy heads bobbing about in the nest. They fledged about a week ago but hopefully they’ll be back next year!

OUR VEGGIE GARDEN

Basil in May vs July. We’ve enjoyed A LOT of pesto and many salads this summer. Harvesting from the garden is such a pleasure and I’m so grateful to have this opportunity. Not everything we planted took, like our terribly bitter radishes and a sad display of peas but we’ll give it another go next spring.

MAGNOLIA & PEONY BLOOM

Our magnolia has been a fickle tree in the past but this spring was her best yet during our time together. I think the grass fertilizer gave her a much needed boost.

Our peony bushes also had a boom bloom season. At one point I counted over 75 buds and it was such a treat to walk out each morning with a coffee to see what had happened overnight. These are a few shots of them in their prime.

TIME WITH FRIENDS BY THE LAKE

Nothing beats a weekend away with good company (even if we’re always 6 ft apart).

LOCAL GARDEN WANDERS

Dave, Dobby and I go on walks every weekend and the boys are very patient while I stop for photos of the prettiest flowers and plants.

PATIO HANGS, NAPS & VIEWS

More to come on our patio renovation (very soon!) but to say this space has changed our lives is no overstatement.

We’ve been able to have friends & family for socially distanced visits, work outside and spend every chance we get in the open air. We don’t take a moment of it for granted.

If all goes as planned I’ll be shooting the full reveal of this space next week with a blog post and more to follow shortly after! Furniture is from Article Arca couch, chairs, dining table & chairs (gifted).

MY FAVOURITE FOLIAGE IMAGE

During a walk along the Speed River with a friend we came across what I believe is iresine (aka. purple lady but I could be wrong) and I was captivated by it’s deep, dark leaves and scalloped edges. I usually shy away from low lighting and shadowy places but this shot is one of my personal favourites.

THE LOW POINTS

Because let’s be honest, it hasn’t been all flowers and giggles these days.

MENTAL HEALTH STRUGGLES

I often feel as thought I shouldn’t lament about anything because of all the privileges I’ve been given. That said, I think it’s important to be open and honest about mental health struggles because depression and/or anxiety really don’t care how good your life may look from the outside. As a recovering perfectionist, I have to constantly push back against an innate desire to appear as though everything is good, even to those I’m closest with.

The truth is that during these last few months my mental health has been suffering. This is partly why I haven’t done a life lately post, because I haven’t had the capacity to process what’s been happening around the world. I’ve felt overwhelmed, frazzled and drained, unable to stay focused or make decisions. Those who’ve suffered with depression and/or anxiety know how the feelings of depletion and futility can take their toll.

I’m very fortunate to have support around me, access to professional help and a repertoire of coping mechanisms to get me through. It also helps to remember that just like the bright spots, the lows come and go too.

Currently, my mental health is on an upswing as I’ve gotten back into a routine of meditation and exercise and I’m finally feeling capable of collecting my thoughts.

This is all to say, if you’re having a hard time with your mental wellness, please know you’re not alone. There is an incredible new initiative from the Health Canada called Wellness Together, which offers 24/7 access to free mental health support including one to one counselling and so much more. It’s really amazing. If you need immediate support, simply text WELLNESS to 741741 to reach a mental health specialist.

If you’re looking for some quick mood boosting remedies this post (and the account in general) is one I refer to often. I also find the words of Lisa Olivera incredibly comforting and affirming.

OTHER LOW POINTS

Of course, the state of the world and all the horrific events in recent weeks & months are collectively weighing us down. These personal lows are trivial in comparison (for which I’m grateful) but I felt it would be helpful to share in case anyone reading has faced similar feelings and choices.

Elizabeth Suzann | When Liz Pape announced that Elizabeth Suzann would be closing due to the impacts of the pandemic on her business, I was in shock. That shock soon settled into sadness and it still feels surreal if I’m honest. It may seem silly to be upset about a clothing brand closing amongst so much other tragedy but ES has been such an important part of not just my style and closet but the philosophy behind my work and the entire community here on Style Bee. I’m remaining hopeful that the ES story isn’t over and grateful for the impact that Liz’s work has had on my life. The Clothing is Political series is a must read.

Interior Design School | I made the difficult decision to quit interior design school. I’ve quit very few things in my life and was feeling a bit ashamed to share this with you all after being so excited about this new chapter and where it might lead. When the quarantine went into effect, my priorities became crystal clear and I knew I had to make a hard choice. I’m glad I made the decision to press pause and I know that this isn’t the end of the road for my love of interiors.

Creative Burnout | I feel guilty for even mentioning work in a negative light because I genuinely love what I do and I know how privileged I am to have a means of income at all right now. The reality is that even a dream job is still work and when it’s all on you to keep the wheels turning, the path forward can be hard to decipher.

I feel as though I’ve been in a fog with work for the last few months and maybe even longer. I’ve been moving through the motions with short spurts of motivation that are inevitably followed by deep creative burnout and comparison paralysis.

To interrupt this rhythm I’ve decided to cut down on the number of partnerships I usually take on for the fall season. It is always scary, especially in a pandemic, to say no to work opportunities but I really think some space for more personal projects will help me start to steer the ship again instead of just letting the current take control.

Do excuse all the mashed up metaphors lol.

DOBBY & EVIE

This furry duo is the bright spot in every day and they always have us laughing. Evie with her lazy bedroom antics and Dobby with his general quirks and strong opinions. I genuinely don’t know what we’d do without these two characters around to keep us from taking life too seriously.

MY 5 WORDS FOR 2020 & HOW THEY RESONATE RIGHT NOW.

NATURE – I feel as though I’ve been able to connect with nature much more than usual this summer. It has been my daily respite from the news and noise of the world. Without the packed social schedule, there has been time to give the little things more appreciation. Instead of the usual blur that the summer rushes past in, I’ve had the chance to savour each week. Noticing every new bloom around the neighbourhood and the changing light helps me live in the moment more.

FOCUS – What focus lol? My mind has felt pulled in so many directions with the capacity to follow through on next to nothing but I realize this is all a symptom of pandemic life. When I look back at what I’ve accomplished this summer, I’m actually pretty impressed with just how much focus was required to make things happen.

GRATITUDE – I’ve been trying to maintain a daily gratitude practice, which involves simply acknowledging three things I’m grateful for. Today, I’m grateful for:

Change and the fact that it’s the only constant. As a Taurus I never thought I’d say that!
Movement and the privilege of a body that carries me through this world, despite my not always prioritizing its care.
My partner Dave. A man that works as hard as he plays and is constantly showing my what it means to pursue your goals. He’s just started a new client project and isn’t home all day with us anymore. As much as I love my alone time, we miss having him here.

CREATE – Right now my sense of what it means to “create” is in flux. A lot of the projects I’ve been chipping away at all year are starting to take shape and this is very exciting! See a sneak peek at one of them below.

TRUST – The sentiment that’s been aligning with trust for me is, “FIND WHAT BRINGS YOU JOY & GO THERE.” These words from Jan Philips have been top of mind these days. I’m trusting that making space for joy will never be a waste of time.

UPCOMING PROJECT SNEAK PEEK

Next week I’ll be sharing more about a collaboration with an independent designer I love. This project has definitely been a bright spot in between the lows of pandemic life and recent events. It’s been so fun to bring an idea to life and I hope you’ll tune in on Wednesday, August 19th for the full story!